Saturday, September 08, 2007

I wrote this post a few months ago, and then I got really really busy, and today, I just decided to post it:

Failure:

One more post for my favorite anonymous reader #5. That's right, Jinx and Andy demoted your ass from #3 to #5.

So in all the heaven and hell bullshit, there was an idea that I kind of skimmed over that really struck me. And that was the idea of failure. In thinking about the possibility of heaven, I presumed you could just pretty much accomplish whatever you want. I gave the examples of sex and chess. The point that I wanted to make was that accomplishing whatever you want, although it sounds like loads of fun, it would actually get quite boring.

Anyways, as interesting as it is to me (not reader #5), but as interesting as it is to apply this idea as a contrapositive for the existence of heaven, it's certainly more useful to apply it to real life.

So, let's say in real life, you get a magic genie, who comes out of a bottle and grants you 3 wishes. You wish to be the richest man in the world, end all disease on the planet, and educate underpriveledged children around the world. Those are pretty lofty goals, but the genie, simply waves his magic wand, and bam, it's all done. Sure, it was a great thing to do, and now you can sit on your ass doing whatever you want. Maybe buy some professional sports team, or use the money to end world hunger, but what I'd measure my life by would be what I did before and after the genie showed up. Sure, I'd prolly use the whole "Ended all disease on the planet" thing as a pick up line on Miss America, but on the inside, I'd want to actually accomplish something for myself.

The thing that the magic genie can't give you is the chance to fail. On the other hand, Bill Gates had to fight every step of the way for what he's accomplished. And although, he most likely won't completely accompish his last two goals, you know he's lovin every minute of trying to succeed.

Granted reader #5, might be right, in that none of the above is that interesting, but what I do find interesting is that the chance to fail is what makes the accomplishment so sweet. The best example of this was watching any sports team make a comeback in the final seconds.

So then, if having the chance to fail is such a necessity in any accomplishment, then why do people hate failing so much . . . or do they?

It seems to me that failures tend to stick with you longer than accomplishments. If you win a big basketball game, you tend to party down for a few days, but the feeling quickly fades away. But losses just stick with you. A good month after a big loss you can regenerate that exact same feeling, and re-experience it. Losing isn't as fleeting as winning.

IMO, on one level, people love to fail. Being happy and hunkidori is good for a while, but then you gotta spice things up with a good little fight or argument or just fuck things up in general.

In a way, I think failure is a way to relate to life. Its a very natural way to relate to life, and I must admit that Ive spent most of my life thinking that I was failing or trying to avoid failing. Somehow, since I wrote this blog 3 months ago, its changed my view quite a bit. I find that I often focus on the possibility of failing or the things I might lose in life, but now I have the freedom to see myself going down that trap, and changing my focus to what I can create in life. This might sound contradictory to the last post, but wtf, Im human.

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